Sorting Feelings for Boys (in ABC)

This is my long-overdue blog last December. I should write more. So far, this is what I’ve written:

“What do you know, it’s December once again. I am too lazy to write anything as of yet, but I feel obliged to update my blog. On my mind, I am thinking of writing about boys, birthday, and my Christmas wishlist (proven effective, btw).”

I took it out from the drafts folder and decided to continue writing about it. Anyway, it’s the first day of the so-called love month, and I am seeing lots of love-related posts from friends on Facebook. Yes, I caught that bug, too. I’m joining the band wagon. Besides, it’s about time I write about what I did for the past months that I have been gone.

Yes, I have taken the advice of a good friend, Jaja, and decided to open my heart once again to date other guys. After two years and a bad break-up, it’s about time I become flirtsome – flirting but still being wholesome. So I’ve had dates here and there. Here we go:

1. P – Well, at least during the time that I should’ve written my blog, Pat is on top of this list. He was, after all, my personal photographer and health checker. I miss him at times. But I do not regret giving up on him and his trust issues / emotional baggage from previous ‘relationship’ (if you could call it that). Honestly, my life has been happier. I didn’t know it would be so easy to let go, once you see how he’s not the one that you really want to end up with in the future.

2. L – I miss L. But it will always be like that. Just like how L puts it: “we will never be what I want us to be”.

3. M – I feel happy whenever he’s on skype. He’s something. But it will stay that way until I see him. Summer, do not be late. I am not getting my hopes up, though.

4. J – Well, I know there’s Meralco there somewhere. I won’t stay up til 2 in the morning just to talk to a guy online. Maybe I’ll see him in SG this year. Maybe not. But there is this girl.. (there is always a girl).

5. U – Our date was a disaster. It did not pass the standards of “decent date”. I was late, for one. But he did not pay for the meal (or did not offer to), he kept looking at his watch, he went home without even waiting for me to hail a cab (or did not, at least, bother asking if he could give me a ride home) gives me a BS reason and then he sends me a message a week after. It does not matter that he made me laugh and I felt so comfortable talking to him. I felt like an idiot. Two years of knowing him down the drain.

6. K – So we went out and I introduced him to my friends. He told me I was “cute”. He asks me out again a week after, and then the weekend after that. And then asks me if I also have a “cute” girl friend?

7. MV – I am guarding my heart from this person. He is the reason why I had to say “taympers”. He is the reason why I had to detach myself from our common friends. He is the reason why I am having a breather now. Because after two months, I can feel my walls coming down. I have to keep it in place. Especially since there is another girl (There is ALWAYS another girl). MV, please do not visit me when you get back.

So in the end, I still end up with nobody. Which is perfectly fine by me.

 

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